Honestly, I won't even hear you knock after this door closes.
It's been a looooong year already and we're only 2/3 of the way through it. Dad died January 12th this year and hopefully on September 12th, the estate will finally be settled. I'm ready to move on and be done with all of it. What was already a very painful situation should not have been made more painful, but it was. Typical.
What is it about a death that brings to surface the true paranoia and greed of people? Why does the focus shift so damned quickly from what you've just lost to what you think you are going to gain? What the hell people?
There are so many parts to this whole situation that are just wrong. Starting with not even being called until THE NEXT DAY! Why you wouldn't call his daughter immediately is beyond me. I don't care what you perceive the relationship to be, you CALL. Someone should call! IMMEDIATELY!
Ok, yes, I'm more than a little pissed off about that. Still.
It's just stupid! Were you hiding something? Trying to get your ducks in a row? What? What the hell were you thinking!?
There is no legit reason for not calling. None.
As you can see, it started off just freakin' fabulous and has only gotten worse from there.
I miss Dad. As much as he pissed me off, and as many times as we butted heads, and for all the shit he put us through....I miss my Dad. I'm pissed at him for leaving behind yet another mess. For leaving a million questions and more drama. I'm pissed at him for dying and making me deal with such a pack of vultures. I'm pissed at him for making me feel hurt, sad and pissed. I'm pissed that the people that are supposed to be there for you during all this are the ones that I can't wait to be done with. Dad would be pissed if he saw what was going on.
If it hadn't been for Mom and The Linebacker over these last several months, I don't know what I would've done. Yes, the BF has been supportive, but it's different because he's not part of "that" circle. He doesn't have the ties to the situation that the rest of us share.
In six more days I will be closing that last door for the final time, if there is any mercy in this world at all. And when that door finally closes, I'm going to padlock, chain, glue, nail and permanently seal it up! It's like the Pandora's Box of bullshit and I'm going to make damned sure it stays closed.
It's not a positive situation so I'm going to walk away. Scratch that. I'm going to run like the hounds of hell themselves are chasing me and I'm wearing brown gravy perfume. I'm out like a scout on a new route, Jack!
People forgot that the focus was supposed to be on Dad and who he was, good and bad, not what he had. It's supposed to be emotional, spiritual, mental...not material.
What the hell is wrong with people? No, seriously, what the fuck is wrong with them?
